No one makes it a goal to be single forever. We all want love; we all want a partner to share our lives with.
Nobody gets to tell you who the fuck you are, for one.
As Taylor Swift once said, “I don’t know about you, but I’m feeling 22.” As a 22 year old, I can agree that I still have nights where my friends and I make fun of our exes, have breakfast at midnight, and maybe occasionally fall in love with strangers…or kiss them drunkenly at bars.
Yes, 22 is a wonderful age, an age that makes our parents wish they were “young again,” and an age that makes our older siblings feel even older. But while 22 can feel as happy go lucky as the Taylor Swift song makes it out to be, being 22 has its downside as well. Here are the top pros and cons of being a 22 year old.
Pro: We have little to no commitments
This can apply to many realms in our 22 year old lives. Most 22 year olds today are…
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We have all heard Taylor Swift’s song “22,” which was released as a single just three days after I turned 22 myself. These are 22 points of knowledge that I have learned during my time as a 22-year-old.
1. Being happy, free, confused & lonely at the same time is a real thing. Your emotions are constantly fluctuating because we are all learning to navigate in the real world. And it’s terrifying.
2. You no longer eat breakfast at midnight. Or anything at midnight. Because post-grad life (hopefully) means working 9-5, and staying up til midnight is far, far from your mind. Sleeeeeep is good. 9 p.m. bedtimes are a reality now.
3. Also, your metabolism is going to start catching…
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1. You only have to be you. Plenty of girls will go out of their way to change themselves to please someone else. They’ll change their clothing style, their hair, their hobbies, their likes, their dislikes. That’s a lot of changing and is way too much work. If you want to work hard, focus on finding out who you are. Then stay that way.
2. Avoid people that cheat. If they cheated on your friend, they will likely cheat on you. Immature people lose interest fast. You’re way too interesting for anyone to lose interest in you.
3. If someone is interested in you, let them make this known on their own terms. Don’t make it too easy and don’t be aggressive about it. It may take a while and you’ll have to be patient, but you will find out eventually. It’s worth the wait.
4. Every person…
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Once upon a time, not so long ago, beauty was the greatest accomplishment – the only accomplishment! – for women. Their survival was dependent on being passed from their fathers to their husbands for income, for shelter, for life. In 1974, women still needed a husband’s signature to open a credit line, so may we be conscious of the fact that these are not ancient, archaic issues, realities of far-gone, lesser times.
Being objectively beautiful, better than other women, is something that’s so deeply ingrained in our psyches, and it’s only now being rendered obsolete as we (thankfully) change the way we determine “worth.”
The need to be beautiful, the obsession, the compulsion, the overwhelming desire, is rooted in survival, laced with instinct, compounded by consumerism, and associated most with the cosmetics counter.
And so there is a tension, and a disconnect, for the great truth we are subsequently neglecting. So long as we cultivate how we appear, how consumable we are…
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it struck me
The other day I bought a used book, and inside the cover there was a handwritten note that said: “you are who you love, not who loves you.” (I don’t know how frequently normal people come across these things, but I tend to often.)
It’s an idea I wholeheartedly agree with, and think more people need to understand: you are not what you earn, you are what you do; you are not who gives you love, you are how much love you give, etc.
It made me think of something I’ve wanted to write for a while, a colossal misunderstanding that we collectively sustain and then suffer because of, all at the hands of our own… I don’t want to say ignorance, so I’ll say… silliness.
It is the belief that the happiness you desire exists anywhere outside of you… and especially in someone else. Not only that a partner can give you that peace, joy…
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